3did@s Blog

I’m wondering…izit the way i love a person is wrong…

Been thrgh several relationship…Never once last more than a year…i tink the problem could lie in me…i really really pei fu guys that can make a girl loves them so much…i really admire them…hahaha…but in this way i’m just a failure…maybe ppl will tell me fate is nt here yet…For those who know me well…they shld know fate this thing i believe…but still i have to do something abt it..and not let fate do something for me…

The girls i loved before…i gave my everything to dote them..love them and care for them…maybe this is deadly to a BGR…shld nt give everything at the very start…hahaha…i just dunno how to give bit by bit…how nt to care for them..nt to bother abt them…This one i’m a total failure…hahahahaha…this could be the reason? I failed to give them a chance to be independent…

When i really love one girl, i do everything for them…i fight for them..i dun care wat other ppl said abt me..i just care how shld i treat her…i always very determine to get what and who i want…fight to the very last breath…give her lotsa surprises..give her the best tt i can..pamper her like a small child…

One bad pt abt me is…i cant stand a girl cry…and i told myself i will nvr make the girl i love cry…but from wat i understand from so many girls frens is tt…they shed tears for someone they love…hahahaha…so u see…this is my mistake again…wahahahaha…

And one thing for sure…I only got one sincere and weak heart…other than that i have nth…if you are willing to work hard with me for the future…yes u r welcome…but if u r toying with feelings…pls fuck off…=)

In my life…i gt two ex that i loved alot…i want to thank them…cuz…they are very gd and nice gal…they let me experienced a short but very sweet true love…and i learnt alot from them…I sincerely wish them all the best…and most important of all…both of u must be happy…As long as i know or feel tt u r unhappy…i will be unhappy too…

I know ppl are gg to say me liao…hahaha…ok i put it as…as long as ppl tt r closed to me r unhappy…me will be unhappy too..sounds betta? hehehe…

What i have learnt…
not to believe everything that is said till actions are shown..
learn how to draw a line to prevent unbearable consqeuences..
must take gd care of yourself before taking care of your loved ones..
care in an indirect way..
not to be over-possessive or super-glue to her..
must make her panic in one way or another..
must show her u r unhappy and not always give in to her..
must correct her if she did something wrong..
still got alot ba…just tt i cant recall for now…hahaha…

ok i shall go for a run tmr to cheer myself up…=)

How do u define reap what you sow…

In work…unless u work as a boss or sales line…if not you will never be appreciate by what you did as an employee…

In friendship, the harder you try…the more disappointment you get…so just leave it…don’t bother and care…

In Love…hm..not necessary for other ppl…but for me..i will nvr reap what i sow..i know you ppl will say…fate have not come..blah blah blah…hahaha…but tts how i feel currently…

In running…YES…this is the only thing that you reap what you sow…You trained hard..you put in effort..you push yourself towards limit..and THERE YOU ARE! you made it to the finishing line…

Maybe…just maybe…in friendship..in Love..At work..everything in life…You will nvr know when to cherish..when to appreciate..when to put in effort..when to care..when to etc etc etc…until the moment you saw the finishing line of your life or another person life…

Ppl..i know you all very busy with things in ur life…pls stop at this very moment and think when to appreciate,cherish, care and love your closed ones, ur frens and etc. If not…you will regret all your life. A very gd example is me…I nvr made an effort to visit my grandma every sunday when she was still alive. I only know how to complain tired…lazy and etc. I regretted. From then on, i’m a changed person…i tried my best to cherish,appreciate and care for everything and everyone in my life. I know its not possible but at least i know i try to… =)

Recently been talking on phone with my frens to make myself dont anyhow think…

My best buddy told me i’m always firm on the things i want…and how come i am not firm when it comes to thinking of her. Seriously i do not have a definite answer. Yes i am very firm on things i want…As long as i want it, i will work towards it,fight with all my mights and if i got it, i cherish it with everything i got.

A fren of mine told me…what u do is gd for her and wat she do is gd for u…yes its painful but time will cure. Currently is the most critical stage and most suffering period.

A closed fren of mine told me..You ah…too gd liao…can dun be so gd or not…always get bully…i told my fren…tts me..and i wont change..

Another fren told me…you must know how to draw line, so you and her wont suffer…i will learn how to draw a line everyday from now onwards…

Well if i learn how to draw a line at the very beginning, she will be fine…everything will be fine…i’m still trying to find myself back…trying to find my appetite back…trying to slp more…everything oso have to try…

It’s all over again…Gonna start afresh…its been liddat for 25 yrs of my life…i’m so tired of all the bgr shit things….Leave me alone for now…Thanks…

Last but not least..ppl..stop saying she lying to me…no matter wat..i still believe her…=)

前几天有一位我生命中最爱的女人离开我了。。昨晚又有多一位最重要的女人说她要放弃。。不要治疗了。。我就在工作室崩溃了。。

我真的不知道该怎么走下去。。我让我最爱的人受苦，没保护她。。她离开我也对。。我生命最重要的人病了，我没法帮她病。。非常无助。。

老天爷。。我求求你把所有的不快乐和痛苦通通给我。。请你放过她们吧。。我绝对不会放弃帮你们挡所有的东西。。希望你们会过的很好。。很好。。不要放弃自己。。

这几天是我生命中活的最低潮的一次吧。。我活的那么久。。我有真正爱过两位女人。。前女友，R。。 还有现女友， L。。两个都说我很好，好到没有这种男人了。。绝种了。。不过到最后，她们的选择都不是我。。她们的决定让我怀疑我真的有那么好吗?

我没有钱。。没有车。。没有样貌。。只有一颗真心对人的心。。我可以不顾一切的为我爱的人做任何事。。我会帮她挡任何东西。。只要她开心，我愿意。。我绝对不会让爱我的人爱我比我爱她深。。因为如果有一天，我不在。。她不会那么伤心。。所有的伤痛。。所有的泪水。。就让我来受。。让我来流。。钱包只剩下六块钱。。我会买chesse cake给她吃。。自己没吃。。没关系。。我觉得爱一个人就得包容她的一切。。真的是一切。。可能我爱的方式错了吧。。

我累了。。有没有人可以来告诉我要怎样爱才对? 我不敢在陷入爱情海里了。。我好怕好怕。。我一次又一次的失去。。好痛好痛。。

Yes…i’m pretty sad lately…BUT…i gt a bunch of backbones…ahahaha…I won’t fall down easily cuz of you guyz…i love you guyz la…

First of all…none other than my bestie(Jiahui)…she’s so sweet can! We got such telepathy that we will know without the other party saying we have problem or unhappy…WE WILL FEEL IT! Isnt tt amazing? gosh… i love my bestie to core! *BIG HUGS*

Next in line…my two dearest god mui…one is madeleine and the other is sufen…Madeleine always there to nag at me…tell me how a girl thinks and feels…She really very sweet la…oso very protective of me…i tink so la…ahahaha…*hugz* i dote her alot…HOR?! ahahaha…

Sufen been bz with her studies…but whenever she’s free she will check on me…we gt such bond tt no one will believe…we seldom meet and we seldom chat but…we got this such strong bond of care and concern for each other…Unbelievable! kekeke…I oso dote this mui…will support her in any way…hee…*huGs*

My best buddy,Alvin…he knows me in and out…i cant hide anything from him la…ahahaha…he tries to be there for me always…Thanks dude…

My gd buddies…Jacky and Nelson…Jacky really is a very respectable guy…he thought me alot of things unknowingly…as for Nelson…We are gd shift buddies..We eat drink and shit together whenever we work…ahahaha…

Last but not least…i want to say thank you to Sally…She’s always the one who cheer me up and encourage me when i’m feeling depressed…I appreciate ur efforts and will cherish you all my life…You are one of my backbone! I will be yours too…ok? hee…HugS…

Thanks everybody..i will be fine!

Years flew by with a blink of an eye. Its CNY 2008.

My this post is to thank pple who’s always been there for me…

My family…

My Two Dearest mui…Madeleine and Sufen(I LOVE YOU TWO MOST! *HuGs*)

My best buddies, Alvin and Rendell…

My gd brothers, Jacky, Nelson and Hong Peng…

My besties, Jiahui and Trixy…

I’m lucky enuff to have you ppl in my life…i’m really very satisfied with things are going now though certain things i cant have it my ways…i believe its not meant to be…

Thank you guyz! I LOVE YA GUYS BEST!

Well…well..why am i doing this? cuz i’m juz purely bored! My MSN got 32 ppl online but i’m toking to none…out of 32 there’s half of them bz…the remaining half either away or mia…LOL tts why i’m here…

Why i so long nvr update blog? Once i had a chat with my buddy…he said wateva happen to u..dont have to let the whole world knows..ahahaha…then i kept tonnes of things myself…ahahaha…

Let me touch on my travel plan for 2008. I’m planning March go to taiwan with my colleague,on my bdae i wanna fly to japan…as i want to be happy i dun wish to stay in SG to feeling unhappy…nothing keeps me staying in SG except my family..=) ok moving on to next..i hope i will still have enuff $$ for Redang and Mt kinabalu & Korea…

These few mths have been full of ups and downs…ok i’ve been looking forward to Phuket on 14th and back on 16th…yea i went there…had great fun over there! hee…Love every single peeps who went except a few..LOL…ok when i’m back…getting ready for my younger sis bdae on 26th..but unfortunately on 22nd night my dad was admitted to hospital due to asthma attack…called an ambulance to send him in..tt kind of feeling is so heart wrenching..Thx god..he’s fine…i was rushing here n there and eventually forgotten who i invited to my younger sis bdae…luckily some rem…some forgotten..of all ppl…someone very important to me forgotten…its very sad but then its oso my fault of not reminding her…had some great fun @ the chalet…My younger sis is one year older…love her to bits…A very big thanks to those who came…i really appreciate it! Most important of all, i bought my VERY FIRST MAN UTD JERSEY!!!!!!!! hee

Recently alot of things happened..not gonna tok abt it…=) after so many years of hassles and tussles in relationship…i learnt that i should not put so much efforts and feelings into one until it really bear fruits…i have to protect myself from now on…i’m nt gg to go all out for someone anymore…no pt if the other party not responding u see…i learnt alot recently…Thx to someone…=)

Oh well…my driving skills is picking up momentum…getting ready for TP…prays hard…ahahaha…nowadays driving lesson is a chore, no longer a lesson that pressurise me…Now i’m counting down to my family trip to HK…cant wait to leave SG with my family…cuz having them with me means i have nothing to look back in SG…ahahaha..ok i’m done…dunno wat else can i write…ahaha…cya guyz ard…cia0z

As time goes by, i starting to realise i want someone who is able to hold hands with me even in old age when strolling in a park or crossing the road..and to be able to do this..is to find someone who will appreciate & cherish every little thing i do for her & not judging on what i have…i still very much believe in TRUE LOVE over money…! Money can be the solution but it can be a problem too…its so contradicting…Life is meant to be contradicting!

I will choose someone who will care for me as much as i care for her…i will choose someone who will love me as much as i love her..Time’s ticking but i’m still going strong! My ex gf, Rina is history…i will not ever ask for her hand again…cuz i been over bothered abt her life…there was a sms whereby she replied…its not important for me to know…Well..tts kinda true…But to me is very important as i want to know she’s well taken care of by someone…then i can rest in peace…hahahaha…Let me tell u guyz a little secret…during my 17th birthday till 20th birthday…i been wishing for my first ever gf to be happily together with her bf…and ya…now i see her happily in love i’m so happy…=)

Edmond is still the usual Edmond…he always care for someone he loves…maybe he really cares too much for other ppl till to an extent whereby ppl just take him for granted…ar huh! tt doesnt matter any more cuz tt dont have any effects on me anymore. USED TO IT LE! and now..i’m thinking positive and be happy! =)

Few days back, i saw this 70+ yrs old couple…they helped each other to alight the bus and holding hands to cross the road…its so sweet…! its something i look forward to do with my wife when i’m in my 70s too! =) To think of it…i’m starting to feel i’ve a gal inside me..cuz my thinking is so like girls one…zzzzzz…

Life’s been boring as usual…its not tt i nvr ask frens go out…i did..but they are not free…hahaha nvm la…something to look forward to will be…completing the montage for kris, air tics bought liao next will be HK hotel…after tt will be my fren’s wedding this coming sat…last but not least my HK trip with my family in Dec…=)

My Mood So Far: NOT BAD!

Hi ppl,

The past few days were so shagged out. On friday…was a normal day of work…till i’m abt to go back..my colleague passed me a gift…he said he bought back from India for me. I was kinda surprise but feel very happy…then when i got home..i opened up the box…WOW..its a lovely model…at first i thght it was made of ceramic..but i asked him what the model is…and wat izit made of? he told me..its Taj Mahal and the material is Marble…Woo…it is really a lovely model. Well…the reason behind why i’m happy is not becuz someone bought something for me…i can sense the sincerity behind it. Cuz when u r abroad…and you still have tt someone in mind to get something for him/her…

Yesterday @ work was a total disaster…hahaha…i thght it was my last day of work…shld be relaxing..but then all my babies (Laser machine) are down. hais…then work till no way out seeks help fro my laser master…jacky…though its his off day…he initiated to come down to office to help me out…i was so touched…when i’m in difficult situation…he came to my help…=) So…we troubleshoot the babies till 8.30pm. then we headed to Vivocity to eat…we went to this restaurant called…hmm…KuShinoya…they have grilled japanese food…overall its was a nice dinner…gd service and friendly staffs. After that got home not long…my mui, madeleine wanna go jog….then i looked at the time it was like 11.45pm liao…i worried for her safety…i went to jog with her lor…during our jog…she told me her problems…I gave her my advices…its up to her to decide what to do…=)

Today morning went to breakfast with alvin and jiahui. I felt kinda happy to see my bestie once again…really very very happy…thx alvin…cuz i din know…alvin told me he asked her along…=) chit chatted with both of them till ard 1+pm. then she wanted to cut hair…i recommend her go kimage…then she went to kimage…alvin and me went to World of sports…i bought a TYR goggles…all ready to splash into water once again…hehehe…missed swimming…after tt..i went to Yishun library to borrow some books…I was looking for this Body language book…but its not available..so sad…but i got another two books…one is Photoshop CS2…the other is Exploring Japan Guide. Wanna read more about Japan before my next year visit…=)

Though it was a boring wkend…i still enjoyed it…but i miss someone….=\

Past Few Days Mood: Happy & Feeling appreciated.